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I used to have a friend. His name was Liam. Liam Payne.
He was the most perfect guy in the world,
with his brown hair and almond colored eyes. His chequered shirts, his fear of
spoons.
Especially his band mates. His awesome,
world-shaking bandmates.
I kinda miss them. I kinda miss him.
Louis, Harry, Zayn… Oh yes, I miss them
all. But I never missed them like I missed Liam. It’s been a decade since we
broke away now. The day One Direction, the worlds’ most successful teenage boy
band in the world, split. We went our separate ways. It was the headlines of
every newspaper in the world. It trended over Twitter for so many days, so many
months… I wanted so badly to respond to the tweets, but I knew.
It
was over.
It had been just like any other day. I, Niall Horan, had been cruising down the
hallway. I always had to pass by Liam’s apartment before I made it to the lift.
He was usually there waiting at his door for me and we’d take the lift down
together to meet the other boys. But strangely, today, and only today, he wasn’t there.
Liam had never NOT been there. He was the
most punctual, most responsible man I’ve ever known. Even if he was calling in
sick, he’d be sure to tell us the night before. Or at least, he told me.
I knocked frantically on the door, but
there was only silence. Oh goodness,
something must’ve happened! I thought, furiously banging on the door now.
“LIAM!!!” I hollered, kicking at the door. Oh
my oh my oh my, what if he passed out? Or he killed himself? Oh no oh no oh no,
this could not be happening!
At that moment, Zayn stepped out from the
lift. “Vas happenin’ Niall?” he said with his flashy smile. That was when he
noticed how frenzied I was.
“What happened?”
“Liam, he, he… I’m worried he might have
killed himself! Especially with the situation the past few days…” I replied,
still knocking on the door desperately. Zayn and I both knew about what had
happened to Liam for the past few days. We’ve been keeping it from Louis and
Harry.
Two days ago, Liam had received a phone
call. “Danielle… she’s... she’s dead.” Liam
had told me in a very grave tone. Danielle had been kidnapped a few days ago
and Liam had even received death threats to her several times. The kidnappers
wanted a ransom for money but Liam couldn’t react according to the Management’s
instructions. But that day, he had received a call from the police.
They said they had found her body.
Liam had been devastated. He immediately
left the studio and has been blaming himself for her death. Even Peazer’s
family members had been sending him emails about how terrible he was and that
he “just needed to send money”. Directioners had been blaming him and sending
him hurtful tweets, only aggravating the situation.
And today, Liam had hid in his room.
“Bust the door down, Niall!” Zayn ordered hurriedly. I did as I was told, soon
after we dashed into Liam’s room. There he was, laying on his bed, covered in
scars, blood flowing from his wrists. Liam’s eyeballs had rolled into it’s
sockets, leaving his eyes bare white. Dried tear stains were still visible on
his cheeks.
“Look,” Zayn picked Liam’s phone up, “It
was really Danielle.” Up on Liam’s phone screen was the first picture he had
taken with Danielle. It was definitely the stress that caught up with him.
“NO! Liam don’t go!” I exclaimed, as Zayn
dialled for an ambulance. I grabbed Liam’s wrist with one hand, caressing his
cheek with the other. “Liam… you can’t go…” Tears flowed down from my cheeks,
dripping onto his already slit wrist. My only hope was that he still had a
pulse.
But it was growing weaker by the second.
All this time, Zayn had also stared
intently. I knew he was worried, but he could never have been as worried as I
was. I looked as the blood which still oozed out from his arms. It just
reminded me of when cut for bieber had been trending. The day someone, out of
random, started a rumor that Justin had smoked weed.
“NIALL, don’t go!” I could hear Liam screaming my name. But it was too
late. The cut had been so deep. I had been so upset. Justin, how could you do this to me? My vision had blurred, and my
whole world became dark. But all the time, I could hear someone screaming my
name…
“Niall… Niall… stay with me…”
By the time I awoke, I found myself in a
hospital. Liam had been the only one in the room at that time. He sat on a chair, next to the bed, but he
had dozed off, on my lap. I stared at him for about five minutes, he looked
quite cute when he slept.
All of a sudden, he woke up startled.
“Niall!” he screamed, coming towards me for a hug. “Niall! It was a hoax, it
was just a rumor. Justin didn’t smoke weed!” he reassured me. At that moment, I
smiled. Liam always cared so much for me. He always did. He was my bandmate. He
was my friend. He was my brother.
At
that moment, Zayn walked in. Me and Liam broke away from the hug, and I felt
kind of irritated with Zayn. That hug could’ve lasted longer. I was kind of
angry.
The rest of the time was quite awkward.
Zayn just asked how I was and I only gave short answers. I wanted him to leave
so badly. I was frustrated. But I should’ve noticed.
I should’ve noticed, I was the one who
should’ve left.
Zayn was worried but he didn’t show it. He always pretended to be
strong. He knew I was already very flustered and that would only aggravate the
situation. Not long later, the ambulance finally arrived.
The truth was Zayn loved Liam as much as
I did.
I should’ve noticed that, but I didn’t. I
always took Liam for granted. I thought he loved me and only me. But he had so many other people to love, Danielle, his
family, the boys, the directioners…
I wondered, did I ever exist in his heart?
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